And yet another story about seven male pigs in a fraternity, this time at Cornell University, gang-raping a woman after drugging her. These seven even put out Snapchat messages saying "free pussy! come and get it!" Those messages were seen by another 50+ Cornell students, who did absolutely nothing to stop the assault. As bad as the seven disgusting perps were, those 50+ others who read the messages but did not participate in the rape, deserve some opprobrium too. And, hey, parents of the seven, that is some HORRIBLE PARENTING you did there, raising a bunch of rapists. And what is it about fraternities that turns young men into assholes and pigs? No wonder I didn't ever join one when I was in college.
The Cornell 7 story has me (and a lot of us) thinking.
I am so fucking tired of hearing about a man's future when we're talking about consequences for sexual assault and rape.
I don't care if he's 19 and has his whole life ahead of him. I don't care if he's a promising student, a star athlete, headed to medical school, or has a great career waiting for him.
I don't care if he's 70 now and what he did happened 40 years ago. I don't care if he's built a nice life since then.
He should have thought about his future before he violated someone else's.
We have spent entirely too much time worrying about what accountability might cost men who commit sexual violence, while barely acknowledging what the violence itself costs their victims.
Her education.
Her career.
Her relationships.
Her sense of safety.
Her mental health.
Her ability to trust.
Sometimes the entire trajectory of her life.
But somehow, when consequences finally reach him, we're supposed to stop and ask whether ruining his future is really fair? No.
And I am so damn tired of watching men accused of horrific things disappear quietly back into anonymity once the news cycle moves on.
At this point, I'm about ready to bring back the scarlet letter.
Tattoo it on their foreheads.
You don't get to destroy somebody else's life and then ask the rest of us to be concerned about yours.
Edited for clarity because some people refuse to read: Photos below are of 3 convicted "promising young men", Brock Turner, Austin Wilkerson, and Derek Nygaard. They were all convicted of rape or sexual assault but received ridiculously light sentences, specifically because they were "promising young men."
THIS POST ISN'T ABOUT THE CORNELL 7, or what they're accused of. It's about how even if (now that it's *finally* being investigated) they're charged and convicted, there's a very good chance that their consequences will be minimal. THIS POST IS ABOUT A HUGE PROBLEM IN OUR SOCIETY. NOT JUST THAT RAPE HAPPENS, BUT THAT THE PUNISHMENT SO RARELY FITS THE CRIME.