Never pass up a chance to sit down or relieve yourself. -old Apache saying

Friday, July 27, 2007

Case dismissed

My wife was in a car accident about a month ago. No one was hurt at all, except for the cars needing some repair. Fortunately, we have auto insurance. Amazingly, the other guy had insurance too! Wow!!


The policeman that arrived on the scene wrote him a citation for hitting her, and wrote her a citation for crossing the double-white line while she was exiting the freeway. People cross the double-white lines all the time. You're not supposed to. He wasn't really sure that she HAD crossed it, and, of course, she denied that she had.


At the scene, the cop told her that he NEVER went to court, so all she would really have to do is show up and the judge would dismiss the case, since this cop never showed up. Ok. She figured she'd show up on July 26. It probably didn't hurt that she was wearing a low-cut blouse that day with her tits all high and perky. (Hey, at least he didn't shove her into his police car and rape her.)


Rather than just pay the fine, you can go to court to contest it. So yesterday she goes to court. Or tries to.


Before you get to court, you have to park. (This is Houston, after all. We don't put too much stock in mass transit 'round these parts.) Naturally, the lot by the court was full, so the overflow goes to private lots. She got charged $10 to park, a rather outrageous amount down hyar.


When she gets inside, the clerk could not find her name on the list. She had fingernails about six inches long. While she was looking, she kicked the cable under her computer and knocked out all the computers in her area. It takes 10 minutes to boot everyone back up.


Then she discovers, "Oh, your case was dismissed on July 10."


"Well, why wasn't I notified so that I wouldn't show up today?" my wife asked, reasonably.


"You're supposed to get a letter," said the clerk.


"I haven't gotten a letter," my wife replies.


So she didn't have to show up at all and pay $10 just to be told that she didn't need to show up. Ah, the bureaucracy.


Looking on the bright side, there will be no black mark on her driving record for this. The whole incident cost $10. Well, that, plus the insurance company hitting us for the $300 deductible to get the car fixed. And it's still in the shop, so we have a rental. Our insurance covers up to $25/day for a rental, but try and find a decent-sized car for $25/day. So, we're paying an extra $10/day for a mid-sized car.


So, $10 for the parking. $300 deductible. And $10/day for the rental, and we will have the car for about 30 days, so another $300.


But no one was hurt, so we can look on the bright side.


Don't cross the double-whites.

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Monocracy


It's the Merriam-Webster word of the day! Remind you of anyone?

monocracy \muh-NAH-kruh-see\ noun
: government by a single person

Example sentence: After years of subjugation, the citizens of the country rose up against the oppressive monocracy.

Did you know? In society's search for the best kind of government, the suffix "-cracy" (which means "form of government" and traces to the Greek "kratos," meaning "strength" or "power") has worn many hats. "Monocracy" pairs "-cracy" with a descendant of "monos," meaning "alone" or "single." The suffix also underlies other governmental terms including "democracy" ("government by the people"), "aristocracy" ("government by a small privileged class"), "theocracy" ("government by divine guidance"), "ochlocracy" ("government by the mob"), and "gerontocracy" ("rule by elders").

Sign up for the Word of the Day via the Web

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Harper's Weekly - 7/24/07

psst! the links are active!

Executive power was transferred to Vice President Dick Cheney for two hours and five minutes while President George W. Bush underwent a routine colonoscopy. Spokesman Scott Stanzel announced that five small polyps had been removed, but “none appeared worrisome,” and the president was soon able to ride his bike.1 2

Prior to the procedure, Bush issued an order requiring the CIA to stop torturing its prisoners and to comply with the Geneva Conventions as the president interprets them, and also made clear that he would, by invoking executive privilege, refuse to allow the Justice Department to pursue any contempt charges that Congress might bring against his aides. “The next step,” said Representative Henry A. Waxman (D., Calif.), “would be just disbanding the Justice Department.”3 4 5

India's parliament elected Pratibha Patil as the country's first female president,6 and it was announced that the United States would have a woman as president on the next season of “24.”7

The Pentagon accused Senator Hillary Clinton of reinforcing “enemy propaganda” when she asked whether the Bush Administration had an exit plan for the Iraq war,8 and, despite an all-night debate, Democratic senators failed to invoke cloture and bring to vote a measure requiring the majority of U.S. troops to be withdrawn from Iraq. 9

In Baghdad two people died and 15 were wounded in the celebration following the Iraqi soccer team's 2–0 victory over Vietnam;. 10

the former King of Afghanistan died in Kabul.11

A steam pipe exploded near Grand Central Station and rained debris on midtown Manhattan,1 and tangled clumps of worms fell from the sky in Jennings, Louisiana.2

Former congressman Tom DeLay gave a speech about abortion to a gathering of college Republicans in Washington, D.C. “If we had those 40 million children that were killed over the last 30 years,” said DeLay, “we wouldn't need the illegal immigrants to fill the jobs that they are doing today.”3

Police recovered a seven-week-old boy from the middle of a road in Ohio, where his naked mother had placed him in order to appease Satan,4 and a newborn was found in a trashcan at a Denny's in Anaheim, California; a 17-year-old girl with blood dripping down her legs was discovered nearby, having just shared a meal with her family.5

IHOP, which serves more than 700 million pancakes each year, announced that it would buy Applebee's for $1.9 billion,6 7 and a new biofuel-recycling and -filling station capable of processing 5,000 gallons of cooking grease per day was about to open in Blair, Wisconsin. “America's obesity problem,” said a co-owner, “is our lifeblood.”8

Authorities estimated that 20 tons of meat are smuggled into Oslo, Norway, each week.9

In China, where flooding has killed hundreds of people this summer, the rampant Yangtze River had caused Dongting Lake to overflow, leading two billion rats to flee to the Hunan countryside, where there are few predators to reduce their numbers, as the snakes have been eaten by southerners and the owls have been used for medicine. Besieged farmers were poisoning the rats, beating them with hammers, and sending them, live, by truckload to restaurants in Guangzhou, where diners pay 136 yuan for a kilogram of ratmeat.10 11 12

A Beijing journalist was detained for fabricating a story about street vendors stuffing their dumplings with cardboard.13

Japan was gradually rearming itself. “Bombing,” said Col. Tatsuya Arima, “does not always mean offensive weapons.”1

The final book of the Harry Potter series, in which Hedwig dies, was released in the United States and sold 8.3 million copies within 24 hours,2 3 4 and in Britain a six-year-old boy hanged himself with a skipping rope.5

A man with a needle sticking out of his arm crashed his car into a Cincinnati, Ohio, drug treatment center,6 Nicole Richie let it be known that she dates only circumcised men,7 and Oprah Winfrey's dog died when it choked on a ball. 8

Recently filed court documents described how Henry T. Nicholas III, the billionaire founder of Broadcom, built a $30 million underground sex bunker in Laguna Hills, California, and stocked it with prostitutes flown in by private jet,9 and it was reported that during intercourse the owners of private submarines are sometimes troubled by peeking dolphins.10

A French geologist stated that a newly discovered underground lake in Darfur, which was expected to help bring peace to the water-starved region, likely dried up at least 5,000 years ago,11 and near Kakadu National Park in Australia, Jeffrey Lee, the last surviving Djok, was refusing to allow an estimated $5 billion in uranium to be mined from the Koongarra deposit, a “djang” or spiritual place where there lives a giant blue-tongued lizard that must never be disturbed, and where the rainbow serpent has entered the land. “I can go fishing and hunting,” said Lee. “That's all that matters to me.”12

http://harpers.org/archive/2007/07/WeeklyReview2007-07-24

Crazy world, eh?

Monday, July 23, 2007

Frank Rich - I Did Have Sexual Relations

Uh, yeah, prostitution IS STILL ILLEGAL, isn't it?


July 22, 2007
Op-Ed Columnist
I Did Have Sexual Relations With That Woman
By FRANK RICH

IT’S not just the resurgence of Al Qaeda that is taking us back full circle to the fateful first summer of the Bush presidency. It’s the hot sweat emanating from Washington. Once again the capital is titillated by a scandal featuring a member of Congress, a woman who is not his wife and a rumor of crime. Gary Condit, the former Democratic congressman from California, has passed the torch of below-the-Beltway sleaziness to David Vitter, an incumbent (as of Friday) Republican senator from Louisiana.

Mr. Vitter briefly faced the press to explain his “very serious sin,” accompanied by a wife who might double for the former Mrs. Jim McGreevey. He had no choice once snoops hired by the avenging pornographer Larry Flynt unearthed his number in the voluminous phone records of the so-called D.C. Madam, now the subject of a still-young criminal investigation. Newspapers back home also linked the senator to a defunct New Orleans brothel, a charge Mr. Vitter denies. That brothel’s former madam, while insisting he had been a client, was one of his few defenders last week. “Just because people visit a whorehouse doesn’t make them a bad person,” she helpfully told the Baton Rouge paper, The Advocate.

Mr. Vitter is not known for being so forgiving a soul when it comes to others’ transgressions. Even more than Mr. Condit, who once co-sponsored a bill calling for the display of the Ten Commandments in public buildings, Mr. Vitter is a holier-than-thou family-values panderer. He recruited his preteen children for speaking roles in his campaign ads and, terrorism notwithstanding, declared that there is no “more important” issue facing America than altering the Constitution to defend marriage.

But hypocrisy is a hardy bipartisan perennial on Capitol Hill, and hardly news. This scandal may leave a more enduring imprint. It comes with a momentous pedigree. Mr. Vitter first went to Washington as a young congressman in 1999, to replace Robert Livingston, the Republican leader who had been anointed to succeed Newt Gingrich as speaker of the House. Mr. Livingston’s seat had abruptly become vacant after none other than Mr. Flynt outed him for committing adultery. Since we now know that Mr. Gingrich was also practicing infidelity back then — while leading the Clinton impeachment crusade, no less — the Vitter scandal can be seen as the culmination of an inexorable sea change in his party.

And it is President Bush who will be left holding the bag in history. As the new National Intelligence Estimate confirms the failure of the war against Al Qaeda and each day of quagmire signals the failure of the war in Iraq, so the case of the fallen senator from the Big Easy can stand as an epitaph for a third lost war in our 43rd president’s legacy: the war against sex.

During the 2000 campaign, Mr. Bush and his running mate made a point of promising to “set an example for our children” and to “uphold the honor and the dignity of the office.” They didn’t just mean that there would be no more extramarital sex in the White House. As a matter of public policy, abstinence was in; abortion rights, family planning and homosexuality were out. Mr. Bush’s Federal Communications Commission stood ready to punish the networks for four-letter words and wardrobe malfunctions. The surgeon general was forbidden to mention condoms or the morning-after pill.

To say that this ambitious program has fared no better than the creation of an Iraqi unity government is an understatement. The sole lasting benchmark to be met in the Bush White House’s antisex agenda was the elevation of anti-Roe judges to the federal bench. Otherwise, Sodom and Gomorrah are thrashing the Family Research Council and the Traditional Values Coalition day and night.

The one federal official caught on the D.C. Madam’s phone logs ahead of Mr. Vitter, Randall Tobias, was a Bush State Department official whose tasks had included enforcing a prostitution ban on countries receiving AIDS aid. Last month Rupert Murdoch’s Fox network succeeded in getting a federal court to throw out the F.C.C.’s “indecency” fines. Polls show unchanging majority support for abortion rights and growing support for legal recognition of same-sex unions exemplified by Mary Cheney’s.

Most amazing is the cultural makeover of Mr. Bush’s own party. The G.O.P. that began the century in the thrall of Rick Santorum, Bill Frist and George Allen has become the brand of Mark Foley and Mr. Vitter. Not a single Republican heavyweight showed up at Jerry Falwell’s funeral. Younger evangelical Christians, who may care more about protecting the environment than policing gay people, are up for political grabs.

Nowhere is this cultural revolution more visible — or more fun to watch — than in the G.O.P. campaign for the White House. Forty years late, the party establishment is finally having its own middle-aged version of the summer of love, and it’s a trip. The co-chairman of John McCain’s campaign in Florida has been charged with trying to solicit gay sex from a plainclothes police officer. Over at YouTube, viewers are flocking to a popular new mock-music video in which “Obama Girl” taunts her rival: “Giuliani Girl, you stop your fussin’/ At least Obama didn’t marry his cousin.”

As Margery Eagan, a columnist at The Boston Herald, has observed, even the front-runners’ wives are getting into the act, trying to one-up one another with displays of what she described as their “ample and aging” cleavage. The décolletage primary was kicked off early this year by the irrepressible Judith Giuliani, who posed for Harper’s Bazaar giving her husband a passionate kiss. “I’ve always liked strong, macho men,” she said. This was before we learned she had married two such men, not one, before catching the eye of America’s Mayor at Club Macanudo, an Upper East Side cigar bar, while he was still married to someone else.

Whatever the ultimate fate of Rudy Giuliani’s campaign, it is the straw that stirs the bubbling brew that is the post-Bush Republican Party. The idea that a thrice-married, pro-abortion rights, pro-gay rights candidate is holding on as front-runner is understandably driving the G.O.P.’s increasingly marginalized cultural warriors insane. Not without reason do they fear that he is in the vanguard of a new Republican age of Addams-family values and moral relativism. Once a truculent law-and-order absolutist, Mr. Giuliani has even shrugged off the cocaine charges leveled against his departed South Carolina campaign chairman, the state treasurer Thomas Ravenel, as a “highly personal” matter.

The religious right’s own favorite sons, Sam Brownback and Mike Huckabee, are no more likely to get the nomination than Ron Paul or, for that matter, RuPaul. The party’s faith-based oligarchs are getting frantic. Disregarding a warning from James Dobson of Focus on the Family, who said in March that he didn’t consider Fred Thompson a Christian, they desperately started fixating on the former Tennessee senator as their savior. When it was reported this month that Mr. Thompson had worked as a lobbyist for an abortion rights organization in the 1990s, they credulously bought his denials and his spokesman’s reassurance that “there’s no documents to prove it, no billing records.” Last week The New York Times found the billing records.

No one is stepping more boldly into this values vacuum than Mitt Romney. In contrast to Mr. Giuliani, the former Massachusetts governor has not only disowned his past as a social liberal but is also running as a paragon of moral rectitude. He is even embracing one of the more costly failed Bush sex initiatives, abstinence education, just as states are abandoning it for being ineffective. He never stops reminding voters that he is the only top-tier candidate still married to his first wife.

In a Web video strikingly reminiscent of the Vitter campaign ads, the entire multigenerational Romney brood gathers round to enact their wholesome Christmas festivities. Last week Mr. Romney unveiled a new commercial decrying American culture as “a cesspool of violence, and sex, and drugs, and indolence, and perversions.” Unlike Mr. Giuliani, you see, he gets along with his children, and unlike Mr. Thompson, he has never been in bed with the perverted Hollywood responsible for the likes of “Law & Order.”

There are those who argue Mr. Romney’s campaign is doomed because he is a Mormon, a religion some voters regard almost as suspiciously as Scientology, but two other problems may prove more threatening to his candidacy. The first is that in American public life piety always goeth before a fall. There had better not be any skeletons in his closet. Already Senator Brownback has accused Mr. Romney of pushing hard-core pornography because of his close association with (and large campaign contributions from) the Marriott family, whose hotel chain has prospered mightily from its X-rated video menu.

The other problem is more profound: Mr. Romney is swimming against a swift tide of history in both culture and politics. Just as the neocons had their moment in power in the Bush era and squandered it in Iraq, so the values crowd was handed its moment of ascendancy and imploded in debacles ranging from Terri Schiavo to Ted Haggard to David Vitter. By this point it’s safe to say that even some Republican primary voters are sick enough of their party’s preacher politicians that they’d consider hitting a cigar bar or two with Judith Giuliani.


http://select.nytimes.com/2007/07/22/opinion/22rich.html?ei=5121&en=dbea8deeac212fb0&ex=1185249600&emc=eta1&pagewanted=print

remember

remember

deja vu

deja vu

indeed

indeed

Delete Fox "News"

Delete Fox "News"

Probably

Probably