Never pass up a chance to sit down or relieve yourself. -old Apache saying

Wednesday, August 3, 2016

police blotter

Every now and then your local newspaper (if there is still a newspaper where you live) will print a Police Blotter. If, that is, you live in a small town. Some of them can be pretty funny.

Here are a few snips from the small town we will be moving to as soon as we get out of this steaming swamp most call Houston, Texas.


Fancy Footwork 
A bystander flagged down an officer just before 2 p.m. on July 1 because of a small fire burning on the playground outside the Boys & Girls Club Laguna Madre. The officer stomped out the small blaze with her feet before calling for the City fire marshal. The fire marshal arrived soon thereafter and snuffed out the hot spot with a fire extinguisher.

Righty Tighty 
An officer stopped to help a motorist who needed assistance with his car. The officer determined that the battery posts were loose and quickly remedied the problem, allowing the motorist to continue home.

False Alarm 
An officer patrolling near the Laguna Madre Water District facilities off of Woody Lane investigated the warehouses after hearing an audio alarm at about 5 p.m. July 1. All three buildings were checked and appeared secure.

Bridge With a View 
On the morning of July 1, an anonymous caller alerted Port Isabel police to the presence of a chair on the Queen Isabella Memorial Causeway. An officer responded to the scene and found four stackable patio chairs on the eastbound outside lane. The officer removed the chairs and logged them into safekeeping at the police station.

Growing Old Not So Gracefully 
A man was given a citation for shoplifting after being detained by loss prevention officers at HEB on the afternoon of July 1. Store officials stated the man walked out of the store without paying for an “Olay night firming crème worth $19.54.” The beauty product was returned to the store.

Bad day for grocery shopping 
Also at HEB, a woman reported leaving her purse in a shopping cart just before 5 p.m. on July 1. An officer gathered information for a report on the incident before resuming patrol.

Damn, that place is crime-ridden, isn't it?

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